Merlot's Search for the Truth about Boxed Wine

Greeting Voignier, et. al:

We have not traveled far since our last communication. We have however spent several days at Auburn University in Montgomery Alabama, where we have landed to conduct an extensive study of the student's likes and dislike in the boxed wine area. Apparently our sponsors approved of our ideas regarding our efforts to break the code of boxed wine, if you will. We have taken the time to brainstorm a new methodology for getting to, and exploring the animating emotional energies within our target market subjects, the drinking masses of American college coeds. And so, we have parked the bus, if you will, and are digging in to find the bottom of our subjects hearts on the subject tour.

Our benefactors, for their part, have sent us several thousand additional gallons of wine to distribute to students in a series of sponsored holiday parties, after which we have begun offering hot morning breakfasts, which serve our operation as a debriefing period, where our teams of researchers are able to blend in, as students, and "direct" the conversation to address the student's deepest feelings toward boxed wine.

The aim, of course is to find what is "on code", and what is "off code" in the marketing of boxed wines, the trigger, if you will, which we may pull to increase the profitablity of our sponsor companies. The research is difficult, particularly since our researchers do not appear to blend very well, which has required that we create better cover stories, which student "buy into" if you will, in order to communicated with them when they are off guard, and revealing the truth about boxed blends. Dr. Emily has the look of a graduate student, which makes students a little bashful about discussing their experience from the night before, particularly as several passed out in the frat houses, or slept out, or slept in bath tubs or woke up by the lake, in several cases. And so, we are doing it by the seat of our pants, making it up as we go along.

For example, Ralph is presenting himself as a Hobo, who engadges students with humor on their way out to and from the free breakfast. Ralph, who has live for a considerable period of time "unsheltered" in The Riverside Park, on Manhattan's west side has been able to gather an remarkable amount of good qualitative information about how these Auburn. Moreover, as a sometime working actor, Ralph is able to appeal to students in various dialects, and regional accents. Ralph's authenticity goes a long way toward reaching our subject when their guards are not up, and has allowed him to uncover some extraordinary observation about student's views of boxed wine. For example, when he has asked the opened ended question "how is this shit?" while holding an near empty cask of boxed wine, Ralph was able to gather a range of reactions on his digital recorder. Several students registered strong reaction toward the boxed itself as an inferior delivery device in their view (including "that stuff was warm tiger piss", and "I'd rather eat de ass outta a dead skunk") Others however, appear to have registered the converse just as strongly ("It was great! Stuff was like liquid Viagra! I might even buy it sometime" and "it was good and plenty and the price was right"). However, it was the overall indifference of the majority that was most telling from out point of view.

What this demonstrates is the opportunity to cultivate and harvest positive emotional responses toward boxed blends. This was further suggested by student's reply to Ralph's rather open ended if forward question: "so did the wine help make you lucky last night". We calculated favorable replies in 71 percent of those asked, while 48 percent replied affirmatively to the question: "did the wine make the going more easy?"