Merlot's Latest Blend Finds a Name

It was said of the great musical genius Chopin, that he carried himself with the air of royalty. George Sand, who has been called the first modern, liberated women, and who was Chopin beautiful exotic lover, said of him: "he was not made for this earth." By contrast, Gershwin was a brash, America spirit, with a full the life and possibilities of the new world. We shall return to the reason for our observations after our report about last night's activities.

Last night, Voignier and I hosted a tasting, at the Basin, where several prominent individuals from the food and beverage industries met with food and wine publishing executives, restaurantures, and several women from, shall we say, another line of work. This tasting was the result of a collaboration with three leading New York State vineyards that supplied the blends that we personally selected in certain ratios.

In spite of the distractions offered by the entertainment these women supplied, the wine tasting was a screaming success, literally, when a top executive chef from one of New York's leading restaurant organizations climbed the mast of a nearby boat owned by Gus', our affable absentee neighbor.

"En Vino Ve Re Tas!" cried the chef, "and "Wolfgang Puck can Kiss My Cuban ass! Not the right side, and not the lefts side by right in the red eye that stinks, not the one that winks," he continued, before falling nearly 20 feet into the chilly Hudson, which required a concerted effort by several leading food and wine editors to save his Cuban ass, if you will, which ironically is attached to a Cuban body that could not swim.

I report these facts not for the sake of some morose obsession with bawdy behavior for the sake of telling to snickering voyeurs who tune in to live vicariously through Merlot and Voigniers extraordinary lives. No. We disclose these events in order to illustrate the effect our product has on our "end users," if you will, and with apologies for using a phrase coined at the height of our nation's market madness driven by new technologies, and creative, if corrupt accounting. Our business by contrast is quite old fashion in the sense that we believe in delivering to our "end users" unbeatable value for a very tangible, and superior tasting boxed wine, and not the pretense of improved efficencies, reduced toils, speedy cacluations, or the promise of so much blue sky. That said, judging from the response last night, and the cleanup this morning, those late rising professionals who seemed to lose track of their clocks, if you will; we think it is safe to say, these blends are ready to roll out.
After consideration of these events and the foregoing product delivered to us for sampling, I have decided to name at least one blend, Gershwin's Gulp, which we feel captures both a sense of tradition and a kind of cutting edge, post-modernists sensibility, if you will. Our second blend, a White wine, from the finger lakes region, shall be called: Sand and Chopin's Brand. Of course, we welcome your comments, kind reader, which is not to say we shall honor requests to change what we believe are the extraordinary branding tools we've hit upon in these names. We believe the first of these musical geniuses' names evokes the right kind of Big, Brash, flavor that can religate "Wolfgang Puck" to the same landfill Americans have deposited their pet rocks and mood rings. Gershwin's Gulp shall be burned into the American consciousness, as thousands first taste it in the form of free samples at our boxed wine stores, conventions and in leading restuarants, such as Ruby Tuesday's and Applebees, where we will provied casks of Gershwin's Gulp for free, to earn shelf space. Once entrenched, we believe it is say will shall dominate the boxed wine market for years to come, making Turning Leaf, yesterday's headline, no suitable to wipe a camper's "red eye" if you will.

As for Sand and Chopins Brand we believe by using small scale advertising in The New York Review of Books, and Harper's, we shall gain market share among the best and brightest, and finest minds of our time. We shall offer boxed wine shipping to those states that allow the practice, and in doing so, we shall reach a network of taste makers spanning our North America and Parts of Chile, if not far flung places, where expats live under sheltering skys, if you will. Stay tuned for our upcoming events, following our African funding.