Merlot Addresses His Critics' Godwottery

Greetings Viognier, and Kind readers.

Recently, we have received critical various email from readers, accusing us of inflated language, false hopes, and out-right lies. My reply is as follows:

Merlot believes that categorical denial will not do much good to change the judgments of those who have made up their minds about us, perhaps determined to hang him from the highest tree they could find along the banks of the Hudson, in some small desolate corner of the park just off New York's West End Avenue.

And so, let me take make an attempt a some small persuasion. First, let me say I have no relationship, professionally or otherwise with Robert J. Parker, the wine critic who has been given credit for establishing a numerical rating system used in so many wine stores to market and promote their blends to the American masses. It has been alledged that Merlot is actually a nom 'd plum of a close associate of Parker, which is a complete untruth. We are in no way "Parker's Toady", or "trying to force feed Americans boxed wine, using mass communications like some pimp selling the fat lady at the cat house for half price" as has been charged. Nor are we "Parker's little pony", or "Parker's beard," or "Parker's little pumpkin ass", or "Parker's Ass Clown". As I stated, Parker is not an associate, friend or acquaintance for that matter. Merlot is not in any way related to this individual, and his in now way attempting to peruse any business relationship with Mr. Robert J. Parker, or anyone in his organization..

In point of fact, Merlot is in the camp of wine tasters, critics and gourmands who oppose Robert Parker's idea that wine is to be rated, with a single number, not unlike a move critic who uses his thumb to offer a stamp of approval, like so much beef under the USDA inspector's watchful eye. Moreover, we here from a reliable source of information that Parker's tastes run to fruity blends at the expense of more classic tasting wines, which is to say, the man does a disser In short, Merlot is no fan of Robert J. Parker, or his rating system.

Secondly, in no particular order. False hopes are the refuge of the desperate man, which is something Merlot believes. However, whether or not our African financing "comes through," our business plan remains sound, and our determination shall remain unaffected. We will not be swayed, and remain confident that funding shall come through, just as lighting strikes the most promising places.

Third, Merlot is no liar, and thus, these musing are not lies, if you will. If you won't, then to the devil with you.

Finally, Merlot's style and usage are the natural extension of a cultivated man, and certainly not the godwottery* of some small mind, seeking the adulation of some imagined noble stature. We speak as we live, without apologies, on a higher plain using the english language, that most perfect imperfect vehicle of commerce, science and art, the way it is meant to be used. If that places us above the sweaty balled, beer guzzling masses in their wife beaters, rooting for this or that sports franchise, then so be it. We have no remorse for the envies of lesser men; and we remain, Merlot.

*"godwottery"
from "A garden is a lovesome thing, God wot!"a poem by
Thomas Edward Brown (1830-1897).

A word with a dual personality. Poet T.E. Brown unwittingly
helped coin it when he wrote a poem describing his garden filled with all
that came to his mind: grotto, pool, ferns, roses, fish, and more.

And when he needed a word to rhyme with the line "Rose plot," he came up
with "God wot!" He used "wot", an archaic term that's a variant of wit
(to know), to mean "God knows!" and it stood out among other contemporary
words in the poem.

If you wish to create your own godwottery, we recommend: sundials, gnomes,
fairies, plastic sculptures, fake rockery, pump-driven streams, and
wrought-iron furniture. A pair of pink flamingos will round it out nicely.